Prelude

Prelude
I ducked under the table, waves of abuse crashed over me as if in a great storm, ships were being torn apart as the poor construction saw critical failures in the hull and....

So yeah...
Well welcome.

I want to first off state that I want to experience none of the following on the trip!

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Welcome to The Guide to Whiskey Swiping.

The first part of this has no bearing on what is to follow. Well again, thats a blatant lie, as its hard (and nigh on impossible) to engage with the present, understand it and enjoy it without the past. I mean when you watch episodes of HIMYM, Friends, Outnumbered and other assorted comedies - they look at the past.

I mean I'm going to Oklahoma City soon, for what I think, is like an adventure of some sorts, well that I can relate to the famous adventures in:
Vienna 2009
Russia2008
France 2010
Norway 2006-7

And the essence of this blog is for success. Yes people, you read that right, success. Its a kickass book voucher of success. I have done the maths, and it seems that the amount of time I invest into this blog vs say putting it into learning obscure Mandarin dialects spoken by regional religious sects that enjoy rocking out to Billy Joel is minimal. However the potential for wonderous comedy and inappropriate references to the past, well quite frankly how can one ignore this opportunity?



Anyway, I am currently just moving out of my student house, preparing to go to America and desperately trying to shift the last bits of spare kit to clear my overdraft and raise spending monies for America.

I'm not too sure of the others on the trips motivations for going, I mean I know one or two of them reasonably well?

For all I know they could be going to gain invaluable 'life experiences', to be honest I dislike that phrase, as life is one continous learning curve really, so to claim that some 'life experiences' are more important than others is somewhat nonsensical. I'd rather some say that 'I'm going Stateside, as... well I dunno, its gonna be badass, legen-wait for it-dary." Stating 'life experience' suggests that the event will have a major impact upon your life, which, lets be honest it may not do so. It may assist forming ideas, concepts or indeed a new socio-political dogma that sweeps the world, but this is unlikely, its running before you walk.

How many times at parties/clubs do you hear people cry "This is the best night of my life!" when the next day they awake with; half a bottle of Jack, a seemingly used condom, and a small Cocker Spaniel sleeping at the bottom of the bed, only working out years later that it was all a set up by friends with a sick sense of humour.



The above is a gigantic, totally oddball, over the top massively bizarre (I guess it is a form of metaphor, but for what exactly escapes me - so the next piece of this will be some form of justification for the aforementioned nonsense) metaphor for what I believe this will be.

I don't think it'll be a defining moment of my life, I believe many of those have most likely all ready occured. However I believe it will be a (hopefully!) useful series of events which will allow me to put the lessons into practice in a constructive manner. And hopefully this trip it will be as far away from life experience as Cairo is from Saigon in 72.